10. Till this day you have no idea that she slips a condom on you hidden under her tongue every time she gives you head.

9. Every time you arrive at her house she hides behind the front door with all the lights off.

8. She won't discuss any money issues with you until you are completely nude (including money for groceries and the phone bill).

7. Photos of her around the house have her face mysteriously blurred.

6. When you look really hard at old pics of her she doesn't seem to be the same woman you are marrying (B&S).

5. You asked her for a gfe/pse and she actually gives you one, except of course she will not kiss you during(you know who you are).

4. When you do finally give her that money for those bills discussed in reason 8 she won't accept it unless it is in a sealed envolope left on the mantle above the fireplace, under the yankee candle (not the rose scented, but the vanilla one).

3. She seems to keep several boxes of baby wipes in some of the oddest places. And you don't even have a baby!

2. She insists that she is Brazilian but according to Yeta her grandmother she will rot in hell for not marrying one of the chosen people.

1. And of course there is the tattoo on her back that reads:
Money exchanged in legal adult personal services for modeling is simply for time and companionship. It is not contracted for Sex or Prostitution. Anything that may happen is a matter of personal choice and personal preference between two consenting adults of legal age. I do reserve the right to decline appointments if I deem necessary