I posted this on my home state board but would like more responses across the Nation
Each escort has her own set of rules that she sets to make her comfortable
So why do guys always try to go around the rules.
it's almost like a power struggle
I say:
call me when you are outside
they say:
no just meet me outside
I say:
give me 4 hours notice
they say:
Can you just squeeze me in right now
I say:
You gotta fill in my form completely
They:
Fill in half of the form
I say:
Don't IM me
They:
IM me
there are reasons for the rules i have, most of the rules have to do with law enforcement, (the others have to do with laziness),
See heres is my main criteria; if you don't follow my rules you are a cop trying to find a way to arrest me
if you aren't one, fill in the form, give me a few hours notice and everything will be copacetic
That's the process I'm comfortable with
And when I'm comfortable, you will be too
but seriously guys what is the big deal about following the lil bit of rules we have?
Most guys who've met me realize I have ALMOST NO RULES in the bedroom so whats the big deal about following the few I do have outside the bedroom.
I'm just frustrated cause I've had to turn down 10 new clients who were responding the my 1/2 hour special just because they did not fill in my screening form or for calling me and asking if they could come see me RIGHT NOW.
money is secondary to my safety and comfotability
and safety and comfortability for me is a guy who follows my rules
-- Modified on 12/11/2003 12:34:01 AM
I think the intentions are often more innocent than you give them credit for. For instance:
they say: Can you just squeeze me in right now
they mean: I'd love to see you, but I didn't have much notice that I'd be free this afternoon. I thought I'd try calling you just in the off chance you're free right now and it's convenient.
They: Fill in half of the form
They mean: "I'd feel more comfortable discussing some of the verification info over the phone rather than on your website" or "I'm not sure where I'll be staying on my trip, let's exchange e-mail and you tell me where you might prefer."
They: Don't send a pic
They: Don't have a picture of themselves on their computer.
but how come they don't put those types of explanations on my form
you're probably right
i don't know why in my mind they are all doing it on PURPOSE just to piss me off, lol
i'm such a conspiracy theorist
For awhile I posted under another alias (no PM symbol, etc.) and stated something that alarmed my fellow hobbyests and some providers...I got flamed (a bit) but it wasn't until one provider and a few others explained why what I said could look like LE that I realized how my previous posting looked so 'LE'! You have the right to play it safe and have a conspiracy theory...you are inviting 'strangers' into your life in a very real way and need to know that you will be safe. I think it is something we hobbyests tend to simply not appreciate---sort of like taking a walk alone at night...for most men, no big deal, for many women, only with a big German Sheperd.
Women and men have different fear levels I suspect,
personally, I'm a big ole scaredy cat
not to mention a control freak
so when someone doesn't follow the correct steps I get all paranoid
Vicky,
Do you think you can get a better feel about a client from a form than meeting with them for 15 minutes in a hotel coffee shop? It seems to me to actually look in someones eyes and see their little gestures tells me an awful lot about their character and who they are.
no etienne,
i don't have time to meet every potential client at a hotel coffee shop especially considering i don't work from a hotel and don't do outcall.
I work from a private comfortable incall location.
and personally I can tell alot about someone's character and the type of client they will be if they WILL NOT fill in the verification information
to me this means they have no respect for what makes me most comfortable and they don't value my wishes
for saying that money is secondary to your personal safetey..
With this "right" attitude, you should be safer than a lot of girls I know.
Most clients are reasonable people, out to have some fun and value discretion as much as we do.. but unfortunately, a small minority spoil it for the rest.
Therefore, if a client refuses to accept any of your security checks and rules, then you mustn't see him. There will be people out there, who WILL value your security procedures.. and speaking personally, i'd rather not see someone who might cause me harm for the sake of a few dollars.
But it's your safety, it's your life, it's all up to you. You get to be what ever you want to be. If it costs you clients, that may be the price you pay and the worth of that is only determined by you.
With regards to your response to etienne you said, "...if they WILL NOT fill in the verification information to me this means they have no respect for what makes me most comfortable and they don't value my wishes.." I don't necessarily think that is true. I would suspect that some of these guys really want to see you because they like what you have to offer. They are not comfortable with printing out the data you require on your form (it is rather rattling sometimes to realize what you've just sent out to who-knows-where when you click on "send"). You undenstand that, I'm sure. So they are hoping (against hope, apparently) that they might find a way around this by, say, a phone call or a short meeting in a public place.
You choose to not accept these alternatives, but that does not IMHO mean that they don't respect you. Most of us want you. We don't want things to go badly. We are just trying to see if there isn't another way. But that is MOST of us. There are others perhaps and they are the ones you fear.
I do see what you are saying and I think you are right
most people probably don't mean any harm but there really isn't anyway for me to tell
and I've had enough phone calls from people trying to engage in phone sex and GOD KNOWS WHAT (the conspiracy theorist in me says they are tracing my call 
that I am turned off by talking on the phone alltogether
I talk on the phone AFTER they've given me the verification info, that tells me they are somewhat serious about the encounter
Lookin' forward to a trip to Beantown to have you control the Sully-spackle all the way to the ceiling...
noone ever fills it out..lol..and I really dont feel comfortable asking all those questions...there is no way to avoid LE if they want you..yes you need to be careful..yes you should screen...no I dont want to call someone's place of employment....I ask for all thos things only because its the norm..and I was told to..I would rather spend 5minutes talking to someone on the phone about themselves then verify...mabye I am wrong but it works better for me..the person who hurt me..had refences I checked thyem..and no other provider gave any inclination he was at all rough..he suddenly turned on me?? I dont think so...now I do things differently that way if something goes wrong..its on me...
yea see the questions on my form I really want to know, lol, I'm kinda picky as well, so I need some of those basics (picture, race) before i see a guy