My thoughts are why ruin a good thing?
Some of these responses are interesting. Guys - ever have a non-business visit? Girls - ever offer one? Personally, I would never ask. https://x.com/LauraCohenSolo/status/1795472989292531748
Warm glow can last for weeks, or months when there is chemistry. I offer discounts to my regular friends whom I enjoy their company, but my time is never free because I am a professional woman of leisure who is a single Mother.
😊Tbh I would not want to share my time with anyone who does not respect the fact that I am a single parent & does not want to accommodate me for my top tier entertainment.
To the fine gentlemen who surprise me with gifts, pamper me with spa treatments & continuously support me I will reciprocate by treating you, like a King.
-- Modified on 5/29/2024 7:20:46 AM
If they are referring to FWB, then no, that has never happened, but I have had on many occasions, with a small group of women I knew very well for years, "friend visits" bc we were actually friends.
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It never ruined anything, it only enhanced it. In each and every case, we separated "friendship meets ups" (non paid, but I would pay for lunch, dinner, etc) from "dates" (i.e where sex occurred.)
I've been given a free session to make up for a last minute cancellation or unavoidable interruption.
I've been invited to stay for round 2, and even round 3 long after an appointment clock ran out.
I've been given free upgrades from fbsm to fs, because "she liked me."
I've had a few public drinks and dinners, but without bcd time.
Never been invited for a pure NSA hookup by a sex worker.
"customer appreciation dates", where girls I see regularly who are totally comfortable being with me outside of transactional sex will ask me to do something with them on their day off. Usually, they want me to plan it. If I'm seeing them professionally at least twice monthly, I can expect three or four customer appreciation date invitations a year. As Robert alludes to, above, social time like this without it being "showtime" for the provider does improve the connection and long-term relationship.
These dates are mostly social between longtime friends, and do not include sex, so a monger should not assume that he is going to get a freebie by going out. You will pay for dinner and whatever activity the two of you decide to engage in, but don't ask for sex. If she is in the mood to give you a freebie, SHE will be the one to suggest it or make a move on you that leaves no ambiguity. If you spend significantly more on the date than you would on an hour session with her, she is more likely to offer an OTC sexual encounter to end a fun day as her way of saying thanks.
One of my favorite social-date destinations is to take a regular provider I'm seeing to Catalina Island on a helicopter and spend the day playing, shopping and dining on the beach in Avalon (Flights leave and return at regular intervals from OC airport and the heliport next to the Queen Mary.). Other successful dates have included private museums, skeet shooting, golf, if she plays, taking her on a catamaran in Mission Bay with me as "Captain" (not for the faint of heart or non-swimmers because I can go for some serious air . . . but haven't flipped one in over ten years!! - Lol). Some of these choices just seem to naturally make women wet, but remember, "don't ASK for sex" on a social date. It will ruin the relationship forever.
Wow, your make believe dates sound fun! What do you pretend to talk about for a whole day when your "date" does not speak English?
to California, I would be happy to take you on a Catamaran adventure. Then you can come back and report that I am everything I claim to be. I'm not paying you, but I will pay for whatever we do and eat. There will be no sex because I don't want to risk triggering my gag reflex. Lol
Hi Coeur-de-lion, I lived in California 1992 thru 2006....my first several years I lived in OC (Newport Beach, balboa blvd!).....every sunday morning I would wheel my ass up and down the length of the peninsula early in the morning, and then I would stop for coffee at the point where the Catalina FLyer took on that morning's group and sped out to the island...I was just a young recent graduate then fresh out of school and strating my career, but I did have ONE very nice "normal" real world date that involved heading out to Avalon on that boat. Kudos to you sir, for treating your regular provider to such a special experience....Catalina by Luxury Helo, now that is classy.
I have not had a provider who I paid invite me back for free just because she had a good time. I have met a provider when out at a bar and we hit it off. She came home with me and we did our thing. She did not charge me. I imagine this scenario is not completely out of the norm.
at the time of the sexual revolution of the 70's and early 80's honed our seduction and social skills in "pick-up" bars. Both men and women would go to these places with the express intention of looking for sexual partners for either short- or long-term. This was pre-HIV, so it was a safer time to be a slut for both men and women. It was a great time to be young. Many of us became masters of the "one-night stand." Lol
There have been times where I have gotten upgrades, an extra pop/hour, a free dinner date included after. Rarely have I ever gotten social time outside of a date and I would never ask for free sex. I have had some experiences of social time or "freebies" but the experience kind of turned me off. Boundaries are essential to managing expectations. Managing expectations are how you keep people happy.
Many years ago I was at a strip club that was pretty extra's heavy. I fucked a dancer in the VIP (for pay of course). She ended up giving me her number. We hung out a day or two later. I got her a slice of pizza and she came back to my place and fucked me. Acted like it was a regular date the whole time and she was clear that's what she wanted. The only money I spent was the $2.50 for her slice. She was very nice but her life was a mess and I was moving out of town soon anyway. Strippers are a lot of fun. I've picked up a few strippers in my life NP4P (its getting harder as I get older lol) but in general the drama isn't worth it.
There was another provider I saw a while ago. She has since retired. She was the kind of woman who was bad with boundaries, both setting her own and respecting the boundaries of others. She would call her clients "friends." She would add social time at the beginning, which quickly became extended sessions. At first I liked it because I was getting overnights at a 2 hour rate. It was fun. However it was starting to get sketchy. She would start randomly asking me for money, saying she would "make it up to me." To be fair she did but... She was just getting out of pocket and her personal life was a mess. She started getting drunker and drunker every time we hung out.... I had to cut it off.
I try to avoid enmeshment and maintain distance. It makes it easier to walk away. I'm trying to have fun with sexy women. I don't want to get too involved with the personal lives of my providers and I don't want them involved in mine. I don't want their mess and I don't want to force my mess onto them. That's what regular dating is for. Also, the providers who do mix personal/professional are the usually the ones who are bad with boundaries and have more messes in their lives.
You mean like a "freebie"??
If that's what you mean, then yes.
A couple of times, some ladies caught wind that I was in Vegas and they'd text me, "After you have your fun, let grab a night cap". Then we'd have our night cap and we somehow ended up in my room.
Of course I have to hear the pre fun time lecture, "Why do you see other women, when I'm here"....blah blah blah
The fk of your life...you're paying, babe 😂🙌
By no means does this mean I won't get mine too though! Ok?! 😘
Your subject line reminds me of escalade1964 who always asked, "Your thoughts if any?"
My thoughts are why ruin a good thing?
Some of these responses are interesting.
Guys - ever have a non-business visit? Girls - ever offer one?
Personally, I would never ask.
https://x.com/LauraCohenSolo/status/1795472989292531748
Then again....
Oh lord, I remember him 🙄🙃🤣
When it comes to deal with a customer.......I would never mix business & Pleasure. Mixing the two is not good. If something goes wrong then both the provider & customer are screwed
And I understand that concern. But in my experience, when I have known several women for a LONG time, sometimes those rules can go out the window. Some people are just perfectly comfortable with each other, their personalities click, tons of trust is built, etc which allows for a friendship to form. It is a unique friendship to be sure, and there needs to be boundaries, but it can happen as I have seen first hand on multiple occasions. It really is beautiful when it does happen.
I'm not as active as many on here, but I've had my share of dates.
I booked a new independent in NOVA back in 2016 or 2017. I think I was her third appointment. I'm normally a K-girl GFE monger, but she was white and very PSE. Natural fire-bush.
It was a great date. Met her at the hotel and went around the world. She wanted anal, and even though that's not my thing, who am I to disappoint? I gave her a 7 / 10 review.
A week later she emailed me for me to meet her again. I wasn't sure what exactly was going on, but she said it was "on her." Well, like I said, who am I to disappoint?" Another date. No clock. She sucked me dry twice NQNS, and if I were younger, it would have been a third time. I did bring a Starbucks gift card, but we're talking tip range, not full freight.
She delisted soon after and I never heard from her again. From conversations, I think she was lonely.
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One time I had a provider offer to meet up with me for a freebie.
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Throughout the session she was complimenting my looks, my penis and my performance. She told me I was the type of guy she'd hook up with outside of work. I assumed she was just being nice and her flattery was simply part of the performance. But then she made it clear she was serious and insisted she wanted me to meet up with her after her shift.
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I declined. I was mostly worried that it was a scam or a set up. But even if her offer was sincere, I didn't want to take advantage of her. One of the things she told me about herself was that she'd suffered a head injury and sometimes didn't think straight.
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Mister Pelican.....your anecdote about the provider who said she was genuinely attracted to you and would "hook up" with you after her shift was very interesting. I applaud your integrity (despite the clear, unambiguous invitation she put forth) to decline her offers, given the fact she disclosed she had a head injury that messed with her decision making and choices in life. That is truly no joke....brain trauma is a very under diagnosed, under treated problem, and most people really don't understand or realize just how much even a simple "bump on the head" can disrupt the delicate brain balance needed for healthy living, and good decision making.
By "when her shift ended", I assume this was an escort agency that she worked with....that can be tricky, even dangerous for both parties if the agency finds out the girl has "gone direct" with a good well paying client (which you obviously were/are.) You definitely made not just a good-hearted MORAL choice, but a savvy practical and safe choice....otherwise, your extracurricular "hook up" may very have been with two guys named "Biff" and "Jamal" who brought their long, thin, wooden friend from LOUISVILLE nicknamed "Slugger"....
I had a slightly different set of experiences and circumstances during the period 1992 thru 2006 when I lived and worked in California and other places out west....I frequented the strip clubs in Vegas every time I went their for both work and pleasure, and I would cultivate relationships with specific girls who appealed to me on the personality/intellect level (they were all pretty much physically beautiful so that was a given.) Inevitably, after spending enough time and money having them dance in/on my lap and allow me to pop a few wheelies with them, our conversations would turn to "DO you EVER date any of the men who you get to know well...?" Most would express fear of reprisal from their employers who frowned on such behavior, for fear of losing their license (both girl AND CLUB) to operate in VEGAS. There were two women however, that I eventually did get to know during this period, and who eventually asked ME if I was interested in getting together with them....one turned out to be a great find who I am still friends with to this day, and she now has a husband & family; the other woman, however, turned into a bit of a nightmare. I'll call her "Joy", as a subtle jab at Irony....
Joy, as it turned out, in 1999, had a serious problem with substance abuse which she was able to hide really well....(mind you most of my time spent with her over the course of a year in the Vegas club had been in a dimly lit, dark club atmosphere. You really can't notice some things you might otherwise pickup on....) Joy's choice of un-reality was prescription painkillers; being disabled in a wheelchair, I have had more than a few women, in various stages of desperation, approach me and just flat out ask "DO you take, or do you HAVE (*insert name of desired LITTLE WHITE LIE*)", and they would usually ask it in a unsubtle way while coming close to my face or even grabbing my crotch. I can say to this day I never succumbed to that type of temptation, but don't think in a couple of instances the thought never percolated in my brain, particularly with Joy who I really truly liked (and still do even though I have not seen her in a well over a decade...)
This was all back in the late 1990s, early 2000s, when the opioid crisis was just starting out....I am pissed to think about what has transpired over the last 25 years and how society, and the US Government in particular, was always 2 steps behind in terms of treatment and help for people who need it, people like Joy and your woman with the brain trauma.....Whether it is Severe Head Injury or BRAIN Trauma, or drug & alcohol addiction, people should be able to get treatment immediately, without question. That would preclude most, if not all unpleasant experiences like what we are talking about.....and would enhance the safety and security of providers & clients in general.
I’ve had similar experiences as what Robert and Coeur de lion describe. I was actually kind of surprised that the providers in the original twitter thread were universally opposed to it. Over the years I’ve developed a handful of friendships with providers that went beyond the realm of the typical client-SW relationship.
For example, there was a local escort who I developed a friendship with after many bookings. We became very close and would often go out to eat or get drinks, take trips or even just hang out and watch movies. We exchanged Christmas and b-day presents. She even introduced me to her kid at one point. There was certainly sexual attraction but neither of us had real romantic feelings. Technically I guess it’s not a freebie as I would pay for everything and took her places she may not have otherwise been able to go. I had also historically invested a lot of money in her through bookings. But, I didn’t expect or ask for free sex. If we did happen to have sex, I would give her money maybe up to her 1-2 hr rate. It worked for her and for me, but may not work for most providers.
But, I don’t think the concept is ridiculous. I think it’s similar to businessmen or attorneys who take clients/partners out to eat or a round of golf and are not billing for their time or a physician returning patient calls after hours without reimbursement. I’m sure the privilege can be abused but not all clients are doing so as a way to get free services.