I thought I could hold it back until I finished and then excuse myself to the bathroom to relieve my colon pressure.... but I was wrong! As I climaxed an ejaculated, my sphincter muscles couldn't hold back the pressure and I let loose a loud 25sec fart that ended with liquid shit splatters that ran down my legs!
I excused myself and washed the best I could, then tipped exceedingly high on my way out of her room!
Someone asked this on the newbie board thought it deserved national attention. I’ll start When I was fairly new to all this I had a great session. one night in my hotel room. After we finished she took a shower and redid her make up. I fell asleep before she left and when I got up in the AM I realized I had left $1,500 cash, a Glock 9mm ( I have a permit), and my Rolex in an open duffle by the sink where she put her make up on. She saw it all. She could have stolen it all and shot me. Glad she was honest. Now days I lock everything in the trunk Yes alcohol was involved
Lost my v card in Amsterdam (I was a bit of a late bloomer you might say). An extremely surreal experience. I was (obviously) stoned out of my gourd and sketching around the red light district until finally I picked one. I get in there and it's like a jail cell with a little cot, and the first thing I have to do is wash my balls in what appears to be a drinking fountain slightly less than crotch high. Clearly I didn't have a clue what to do and of course she spoke next to no English. Walked out at the end, high-fived my buddy, and went and got outrageously drunk and stoned. It was kind of sweet...I guess...
What kind of drugs do you sell?
I went on a 19 day trip (with a guy I didn't know) to the desert island paradise of the Maldives. It was sheer luxury, picked up from the airport by speedboat, private villa, private beach etc etc.
The resort islands of the Maldives are about the top of world class desert island fantasies. I was so lucky that I went there with a guy I didn't know and had a fantastic time.
I got him to try snorkelling and kayaking, we had such a lot of fun.
But it was probably the most stupid thing I've ever done. Simply because if things hadn' gone well I would have been stuck on this tiny island with no way out.
4. Leaving a receipt for condoms in my wallet
3. Leaving a map to a hotel in my pants pocket
2. Writing my "ToDo" list in the Goals section of my fitness journal
1. Locking my keys in my car at the provider's incall
I'm sure I can come up with a full 10 before this becomes uneditble...
...no, I don't drink and hobby. It's just not safe.
car keys...i did that once
her partner insisted we get out of the room because she had dibs on it. We crowded all our clothes and outselves into the closet and had to make out quietly in there for about 10 minuets until her partner was done with her date.
I was days like that that made me wonder.
the agency neglected to tell me that the girl had switched hotels. I arrived in the lobby, called and got the room #, went up and there was the "do not disturb" sign on the door. Knocked once, twice, a little harder the 3rd time, then retreated to call the agency again when there was still no answer. I still wonder what I'd have done had someone had opened the door! "You don't look like your pictures, where do I put the envelope?" LOL
It turned out to be one of my best experiences, when I got to the right hotel and room. Details in my reviews.
-- Modified on 4/27/2006 8:13:43 PM
Just imagine, she probably could not get out of the room quick enough after coming across your bag of toys.
I went to a gentleman's club in Texas, got a BBBJ in the champaign room (Chris Rock was wrong!) and she gave me her home phone on a cocktail napkin to contact her next time I'm in town. Not thinking, I left the napkin on my desk at home. I retrieved while my wife was on the computer -- she's never mentioned it, but I nearly had a heart attack.
I thought I could hold it back until I finished and then excuse myself to the bathroom to relieve my colon pressure.... but I was wrong! As I climaxed an ejaculated, my sphincter muscles couldn't hold back the pressure and I let loose a loud 25sec fart that ended with liquid shit splatters that ran down my legs!
I excused myself and washed the best I could, then tipped exceedingly high on my way out of her room!
OMG, i hope you're kidding about that, 25 seconds and you couldn't stop that eh????
just tell her, hey, i'm into scat, LOL
Early on in my hobbying career, I booked a BDSM fantasy role-playing session with two women. It started out great, with them pretending to be lesbian robbers who broke into my house and would do anything (they even assaulted my 'wife' in front of me) to get me to give up the combo to my safe.
At one point they had my pants down around my ankles and my arms and legs shackled when one of them starts shoving something up my ass. I had told them that I was willing to try this but would yell 'red' when I wanted them to stop. As this thing went further up my anal orifice I first yelled 'Stop' a few times and then finally 'red'. I told them I didn't think I could handle anymore of this. The woman behind started laughing and said, 'I already have this strap-on 8" up your ass'. I turned around and saw that she had a strap-on attached and that it was buried in me.
At that point, I started feeling faint and then nauseated. As she started to pull out, I lost it and hurled all over. Needless to say, I didn't get a happy ending out of that session.
-- Modified on 4/27/2006 9:52:00 PM
I believed that I mattered. I forgot for a second that I was only a means to an end, not more not less.
Boy did I feel naive!
I don't blame anyone but myself. It was sure stupid!
seems like that happens alot, I even find myself thinking about the women many times. But I read the reviews over and over and realize that she is just good at what she does. I do think general friendship is possible though.
I have been there with one of the first I ever met.
After a dinner date, we just talked. I didn't want to take it any further and ruin the possible "friendship".
Boy was I nuts. Again, all my fault, and the last time that ever happened.
and awoke at 4:30 a.m. (hung over)next to my provider who was sound asleep. I realized suddenly I had to (1) drive 100 miles to get to where I was supposed to be before my SO awoke, and (2) come up with a plausible reason why I hadn't returned SO's several calls that night. Whew! very close call....
In the Stupid catagory: Told a buddy about a wild time I had w/ a provider, unfortunately his wife was around the corner and heard everything. She still hasn't told my wife, but needless to say I don't visit them as much as I used to.
Advice: Keep the hobby to yourself... ALWAYS
You wouldn't be one of the Everly Bros., would you?