When I first started in this industry I only did dominatrix work and that was very part time, maybe once or twice a month. When I decided to quit my day job and do this full time including escorting, I really did not expect I would get that many requests. I was going to give myself a few months to give this a go and if it did not work out I was going to go back to my day job. I remember placing my first ad and I was hoping I would get a response within a few days. I think I got about 10 responses in the first 5 minutes. lol
My screening and criteria for clients that I see has not changed, but I no longer put up with the nonsense that I used to. The guys with the most drama are always the worst clients and also the ones that you make the least amount of money from. This is my job. Once I started treating this is my job and no longer as a 24/7 GF to some of my clients my sanity and sobriety emerged and I also started making way more money. I now have very strong boundaries and if clients repeatedly cross them I unfortunately have to cut them loose.
Without a doubt one of the best life decisions I have made. I only wish I would have started sooner!!
I’m considered a dinosaur 🦖 in this industry. lol 😂 I started as an escort working for several agencies in College & when I got arrested by an undercover sting in San Diego I decided to become independent. I wanted to be responsible for screening all my potential clients. I started my own adult entertainment business where I employed male dancers and female escorts & exotic dancers. I used to book via phone calls. I had serval ads in the yellow pages. 📃
Besides my rate increasing over the years, so has my expertise. I am a VIP companion. I offer inclusive vibes.
I started requiring a deposit to book back in 2010. As a single parent I could no longer risk getting flaked on. I need to have real id & them holding it taking a selfie 🤳 so I can screen for my safety. I do all my own vetting for criminal backgrounds. The only way to bypass my screening is if a personal friend or family member can vouch for you. I have evolved tremendously over my decades in this thrilling industry. I continue to grow because I am always learning. I don’t see a lot of people. When I first started I did not care whom I shared my energy, but now I realize Chemistry = Connection is needed.
I started off as only none GFE no bbbj & now I offer everything 😝 I am so proud of myself. I’ve come a long way baby! Long ago I did not care about my clients & now I do. My clients are my friends. I truly love & care about my friends. I connect with people on an emotional level it’s not only physical. Mentally you have to have your shit together to be a good provider. Being healthy means physically, mentally & emotionally stable. Be cautious of who you share your energy with. Some people have bad energy & money can never pay to get your time back. I love TER! Thanks for posting!
-- Modified on 4/14/2025 4:37:02 AM
A good portion of sellers in this biz despise a large segment of their own customers. Many are only doing it strictly for the $ and are repulsed by their customers . Which is understandable on a high level but creates pretty discouraging dynamics.
A good portion of customers in this biz worship the sellers and look down at other clients as inferior. They don't stand up for basic customers rights and think whatever the seller does is justified a priori.
It's very unique biz in that somehow a lot of both sellers and clients despise or look down at a large portion of clientele. And I contend if it wasn't pussy sellers were slinging, it would go very differently.
So I made it my duty to try to help clients whenever I can, however I can. Many of these guys don't have a voice and don't have anyone to stand up for them. So that's one change for me.
Last but not least, there are some great providers in this line of work, those who are honest, respect all their clients and are really hard workers. I underestimated how hard their job is, so it made me way more appreciative of how well they do their job and how much effort it takes. It's easy to see when someone cuts corners and when someone goes above and beyond.
-- Modified on 4/14/2025 12:49:54 PM
Thank you for your response, but what about your own personal experience and perspective? You gave observations about "a good portion of sellers" and "a good portion of buyers" but what is your own personal journey from when you started seeing providers until today? What changed? What is the same?
I guess a few things, I'll keep it to maybe two points for now.
They are pretty personal so only applicable to how my mind works.
First, I think the convenience of p4p definitely made me lose game. As a person who is single, the instant gratification is just too tempting if I have the $. The ability to skip the "work hard for it" part in favor of dopamine is too addicting for a sex addict. This worked fine but after a certain point I realize that I'm in my late 30s and most of my friends are married and having kids. And it's hard to get back to the slog of the dating game when I know I can just pay and have what I want right now and wont have to worry about anything else after I leave.
Second, I definitely understood that my mind and body can't reconcile pure lust for sex and affection. When I was in relationships I alway thought my sex life was kinda lacking and I thought it was because the women I was with just didn't care for animal sex. Well, turned out that this desire for animal sex is in conflict when I have a lot of affection for the woman. Yes it did take me a good sample size of working women to fully understand that. And just so we're clear - it's not like when I want to have animal sex I don't have any feelings for the woman... I treat her with respect and all... but there's a difference between a stranger and someone who you have strong feelings for. And there were few p4p selling women whom I saw for sex but I actually didn't care that much about sex after seeing them for many times. I know this might be common for others, but for me it was kinda eye opening.
Sorry for the length of this exposition, this bildungsroman. Lol.
This was very personal and was not easy to write. But I like spilling my soul on message boards 
Started with agencies then pivoted to indies. Started $300-$400 hour but inflation, my tastes, and budget have increased. Started with 1-2 hour meets even with old friends but now focus on 4 hours or more, and doing more overnights now. I don’t mind deposits and often pre-pay with old friends now, I’ve never been burned. When meeting the occasional touring gal in my home town, I hate visiting some crummy Courtyard incall and often spring for outcall at nicer properties. Lastly, I experiment less now - I have a lot of diversity in my meets but they’re kinda similar, I know what I like and don’t like. Oh, I’m also more eager to invest in sexy gifts even for new friends, imma lingerie snob and have never had to apologize for that weakness Oh, another one - I only do dinner dates with old friends, mostly cuz some gals wanna dress to kill. I totally get it, you want to turn heads, but the arm candy thing actually makes me uncomfortable - at least in my home town.
When I first started mongering in 2002 - almost 25 yrs ago.... all you had to do was go to a bawdy house. There were a couple in York, PA where I started my mongering career. There was one AMP called Lily's on Queen St and Oriental Spa couple of blocks from it. Also there was a place called Gentleman's Club on George St. Things were simple. You just showed up, and they took care of you. You could nut off in under $200
When I moved to DC area, you could still get a hooker at $250-300. Most of the reputable ones on TER would only ask you to call them. You would rattle a couple of girls you've seen and if she recognized someone she knew, you were good to go.
Then there were M&Gs. Those were amazing. Most of these men were 50-60 yr old American born men, but they welcomed me. I never felt out of place or awkward. I remember attending a few in Laurel, MD in a bar called Green Turtle. That aspect is completely gone now.
All these were good old days..
OK.. Back to present.. Now you have to think strategically on how much money you have in your discretionary budget and how much you want to spend on pussy. Rates have soared, and if you ask me the value is no longer there. Women have become more entitled. It's like playing a complicated game of three dimensional chess balancing and nurturing SB relationships with quick fix you can get from a regular P4P hooker. Shit - even... getting an SB is starting to get harder and harder by the day.
I think the real value is in South East Asia - countries like Thailand and Philippines.
America is going to hell in a hand basket - both politically and pussy wise.
Back to the original statement that I started with.. Change is the only constant in the world. I hope things change for better. After all, hope springs eternal.
-- Modified on 4/14/2025 11:50:31 PM
I haven't changes at all even though the hobby itself has changed a lot around me. I fell into this sort of by accident many years ago, scratching the itch for a sensual massage, and on visit #2, I got way more than that! The spontaneous events that took place then was fun! I enjoyed the hell out of it!
I don't get in the mindset (trap) of thinking the only way I'll ever get with a girl like THAT is to pay. That's a hella hard pass for me. Luckily I don't need to though as my gal is THAT. But...... I do like a good spontaneous unplanned (sort of) short and to the point rendezvous from time to time. And it's the most fun to me when it's with the gal next door type. Just the good ole gnd. Those gals are the BEST. Keep it light, spontaneous and fun and it makes all the difference.
My personal guidelines are,
No rw info shared period.
No deposits ever
Keeping only 2-3 regulars max (I have 2 long time regs)
Never more than 3-400
Never more than an hour-ish
Never more than 1 days notice
Never let the hobby sex be more than 10% of all sex.
Never leave a session so googly eyed that you forget all the above.
