+ You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
+ You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
+ Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center.
+ Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
+ You burn your yard rather than mow it.
+ The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
+ You give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
+ You come back from the dump with more than you took.
+ You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
+ Your grandmother has "Ammo" on her Christmas list.
+ You've been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
+ You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
+ You've bathed with flea and tick soap.
+ You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
+ Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.
+ You took a fishing pole to Sea World.
+ You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
+ You have a rag for a gas cap.
+ Your father does the "Pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
+ Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.
+ You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
+ You can spit without opening your mouth.
+ You think your license plate personalized because your father made it.
+ Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
+ You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer quota.
+ You have a set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on the side.
+ The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
+ Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
+ You thought the Unibomber was a wrestler.
+ You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
+ You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.
+ Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.
+ A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000 worth of improvement.
+ You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.
+ You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
+ You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
+ Somebody tells you that you've got something in your teeth and you take them out to see what it is.