Girlfriend and I are thinking of making our own personal video ... NOT for public release, just as something that might make a sexy and hot lovemaking session off the chart.   We’re not youngsters, but she’s still a head turner.
Don’t want to try to film ourselves .. would prefer to have someone else film.   Advice on how to do this?
Better to have a man or woman?  Or does it matter as long as I screen carefully?

I think the main problem with a third party is maintaining privacy and insuring against "accidental" leaking of the video.  Remember the case of Vanessa Williams 1984 Miss America? Years earlier, she had signed a model release and a photog took nude and provocative photos.  According to the release, the PHOTOG retained the rights to sell or use those pics regardless of his VERBAL promises not to do so. After VW was crowned, he sold them to Penthouse which published them.  
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There are "provider friendly" professional photogs and threads on General and Newbie discussing same.  Make sure you understand whatever you sign and insist that YOU own the material and all rights to its use.  
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Take a tour through a tech / photo store and catch up on the latest tech and gadgets. There are video cams that are small and easy to use. "Helmet Cams" (POV skiiing videos and skydiving videos); eyeglass cams with tiny cameras in the temple pieces; ...  Multiple cameras on tripods can catch lots of angles for you.  
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You can probably learn to do simple video editing on your own PC or Mac.  Fancier editing (fades, etc.) might take more effort but not too important for porn.  
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Good luck! Have fun!

in terms of needing a third person to shoot. Get a mount for your camera or phone, frame the shot and let it roll. Then edit later. Lots of people do this to make amateur porn and you can find lots of examples on PornHub. And if you do end up using a third party all you need do is get the correct memory chip for the camera or phone and remove it once the video is shot. Then you have the only copy.
Here's a link to an amateur video that will lead you to lots of others...Many of the don't show the female's face or anything of the male above the waist.

I think the desire for a camera person might be due to a bit of exhibitionism (which sort of motivates the movie making in the first place.)
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If you can overcome that desire and film yourself, set up a number of angles -- using multiple smartphone cameras, etc.  

Been fortunate to have slept with some who have performed in porn.  I have consistently been told that it is not sexy, it is work, and there are many retakes over days.

Always says its private, not for public release, just for two of us, blah blah blah, until you eventually break up.  THEN, whichever one of you looks more lame in the video can count on the OTHER one to publish it online.  

I've lived with a simple policy for all of my adult life:  

I've given a little bit of thought about doing porn but everyone tells me that I'm too pretty for porn.

Sure... lets go with that reason... :p  

If anyone has told you that, what they are really saying is that you ARE good-looking enough for gay porn.  

Considering his face would be buried in a pillow during every scene. lol

25 years ago i did a 5 min video with a hot GF  ( i was single then) .. . so i was 25 yrs young and 35 lbs lighter and all i can think was ...   OMG how does this guy ever get laid LOL ..   you might be surprised and disappointed how you look on video.  

GaG and CDL can get their hopes up and their woodies down but I only play with the ladies.  
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I'm sure they'll enjoy each others' company!

As Jerry Seinfeld once said "There is good naked, and bad naked. Men are bad naked".  That thought and watching myself visiting my primitive  self, grunting, gowning, screaming, kept me from ever thinking about doing it.  Plus who wants to watch a hair ass go up and down.  

I looked so much younger back then.  

spit coffee all over my keyboard.  LMAO!

... just you and the lady. I can’t imagine having another tool in the room and my not being paid for it.  

...Someone is always photoshopping it to make it half the size of it IRL

Fucking my hot (I assume she's hot) Porn Star wife is not exactly something I'd be ashamed of.

I’m a little ashamed of my morning Vday date. Won’t even review that. Hopefully the evening date is better.

Yea she’s hot. Not just because she’s my wife but she’s one of rhe most objectively beautiful women in the world. hustler cover (I poured a drin out for Flint on that) and Penthouse pet yada

A couple I used to see had a positively stunning erotic shoot with Santillo. The shoot was all stills (no video) to my knowledge, but there was definately plenty of "action" going on between the couple. Also, this was years ago, so it's definately worth seeing if he's added any video options to his roster.