Hey Folks,
Could use some feedback or a steer. I am a gentleman hobbyist. Mid 50's. Nothing too wild, just a sweet romantic hobbyist. But twice now (in 10 years) a provider has written horrible stuff about me in some section I don't have access to. Providers who I know have alerted me and said they read some really bad stuff about me. "he very rough" "he grabbed for the money" . Stuff i wouldn't dream of doing or saying. I think it's a result of leaving a less than stellar review. But what does TER do to protect hobbyists from such actions? A provider who I am close to said she removed one of the two comments I received. Would appreciate any insight into this realm and best ways to address it when it occurs. Again, with the last provider who seriously under-performed, I simply left? Wasn't rude or disrespectful at all? Appreciate the insight!I'm not sure there is much you can do since you're not even supposed to know what's on that board. TER could ask you who told you that and they'd get in trouble if you told them.
I think your only salvation is to have those gals who support you act as references and perhaps proactively tell others that you are alright.
You missed a golden opportunity to name this thread "Episode V: Providers Strike Back"
That said, we don't have access to the ProvidersOnly board, so, there's no real recourse there. Less so because you have no proof that these events didn't happen. The obvious solution is to use p411 (whose days are numbered) or make sure the references you're providing are from girls you've really clicked with and will give you a glowing reference.Providers are PROHIBITED from sharing what is said on the PO board, just like reviewers are forbidden from leaking things said on the RO board. Now that he has run his big fat mouth here on GD telling the whole fucking world that there are providers leaking things said on PO about him and any provider sticking up for him is going to be labeled the leaker.
To the OP, my advice is to suck it up like a man. Yeah it sucks to have people telling lies about you, I can relate to that fact more than most, but apparently you have at least a couple of ladies who like you, (at least they do now, they may feel differently if they get kicked off the board due to your lack of discretion) I would spend my time cultivating more good relationship and let the haters hate.
So there is another guy in your age range that a lady said has Asperger Syndrome and trashed, that was posted as well
Just say what was posted on our po board????
What in the actual fuck? 😒
MacLeaky is still here, so they can't be taking it too seriously.
What in the actual fuck? is right.
That the provider who was talking shit is brynn huh 😂😂 that’s your last review which was a 5/5 😂😂
It's so good to have a topic different from the last few days.
Rip the leaking bitches and bastards new ones!
"Some provider said some guy...."
Wow that's worth getting your panties in a knot for. Guess what? Some guys on the PO board complain about some providers with out of date picks, bad attitudes, and ridiculous rates.If you honestly think people aren’t sharing info across boards then I’ve got a bridge to sell you...
Considering what this board is predicated upon, I wouldn’t trust anyone here.No doubt. Old timers here are more likely to have friendly providers feeding them all the gossip. Old timers are objecting to others now getting in on the gossip.
Almost every time a guy describes himself as "Sweet" or "romantic" or the famous "nice guy" he turns out to be complete trash. I'm just saying. In my years of screening and meeting guys, screening for other ladies and getting feedback, whenever a guy describes himself as a nice guy, i know he's going to be at minimum annoying, at worst terrifying. So i'm not sure her posts about you are unwarranted. Its very unlikely a lady would make comments like that about you if they didn't happen, theres a reason those website are confidential.
I have NEVER described myself as either "Sweet" or "romantic". I think most providers recognize the various synonyms for "stalker" "boundary pusher" and "love sick puppy dog" lmao
Can anyone even imagine the likes of me describing myself as a "nice" guy??? rofl. Thanks Momma, you just made my day.
After reading the OPs reviews I think you may be onto something.
Apparently she doesn't want to see you anymore. Go find another hooker to play with.
I'm a nice guy. Of course I don't usually toot my horn when setting up dates because ... well I wasn't taught to brag on myself. But if I didn't think I was a nice guy, well, I'd feel pretty shitty about myself in that case.
Well, thanks all for the colorful responses! Did not know certain protocols that were called out. live and learn.
I did hear a suggestion last night that worked. And that was from a provider I have not reviewed. They pointed the negative comment I was referring to out to me. They have simply posted the negative comment was not their experience, and that I was a good guy. Will accumulate those. Ultimately, as many of you said, its a free country, so touche, I will get some thicker skin.
because another potential provider brought it up
Here I'm sympathetic to all the women who claim fake reviews and things on open boards they don't like... I'm rethinking that one...
Like others though I wouldn't be worried about it. My guess is there's a lot of stuff like that on anyone with a decent amount of reviews. Hell, I caught shit on the message boards here from a visitor for just being nice to her on the boards and PMs. Still, it's interesting and I'm sure it's abused plenty. As would be any secret list. And I'm sure the real women know and judge the woman posting and your other feedback. Ah well. What can you do?
because another potential provider brought it up
the provider was using that flawed info to determine whether we should get together...and that could happen again and again..simple train of thought
I don't care what they think but if it begins to impacts who sees you or not than its an issue
no, it must have been a while ago. The provider said it was last summer but wouldn't say who. I had never heard of this secret providers resource. The thought I "was a nice guy and wanted to let me know". They put a comment in to the contrary.
You've never met him, but you are 100% implying he's a " problem client". Based on the word of another woman....you have also never met.
This is the 1st time on these boards I've ever " jumped in anyone's shit". But you're dead wrong here.
Now, if you have seen him or witnessed 1st hand that has a problem, then I'll recant....
But reviews are subjective...
Each writes what they feel was of note...to them.
" Oily skin"?
Ok....maybe she has a true dermatological issue.
But do you know That?
Can you 100% say that she kept up with her hygiene that day?
If the guy had shown up with oily skin....something tells me that you would be on the soapbox bashing his hygiene habits.
Basically, you are going to side with " provider"....everytime.
Which makes your opinion " null and void".
This guys best bet is to never give out his TER name, you’ve looked through his reviews haven’t you? There are a lot of ladies that won’t see him based on his reviews and scoring. He will do just fine only using references from those that have no issues with him.
And of course ladies are more likely to stick together, just like , Bros before Ho’s.
I did look at his reviews. And I scrolled through the ratings of the ladies he reviewed low. They tend to have a lot of middle of the road reviews.
Is he a little more critical than Most?
Probably...
But reviews are ( once again) subjective.
I'm not here to take up for him...
I'm just speaking up as to the " provider is always right" mentality.
I'll speak up against a guy when he's in the wrong just as fast.
I've been a nice guy. I had a reg for 8 years get into drugs. I'd white knight since I didn't see it and of course she treated me well.
After about 8 NCNS's I post a vague complaint. Next thing I'm getting threats from her and her duo partner, getting asked by other SPs to write reviews and to share personal info on this SP to wreck her. Getting push back from those SPs when I wouldn't. The guy's got a valid concern. But, you'll find someone to see to get back into things. Be low key, but they're not going to put someone on the list that's going to push back, so I'd disagree with the idea that being nice is going to do it... the predators are looking for the nice ones
I've suggested the mods have something here to update reviews for scenarios like mine. But, I can see where it would be a headache of a 'he said, she said' too. Yet, I've found most you want to avoid won't show their true personalities for many dates or many years. Meanwhile, there's always another 'nice guy' to take advantage of.
Seriously! I showed up clean, friendly, and with a good attitude. She was kind of dirty..oily was the nicest word I could come up with. Like she'd been sleeping all afternoon in a hot room. Did not freshen up at all. I also asked her to brush her teeth too but didn't put that in the review!. My review wasn't trying to hurt her but to give a reasonable steer to other hobbyist. "not freshening up" seemed like something I would want other hobbyist to take into consideration.
2 providers told me about the negative comment BECAUSE they thought I was a nice guy. You think someone who describes themselves as a nice guy is probably a problem? a stalker? Geez.While I agree with you, it’s there choice who to see and give it up to. As I said, he should avoid having them know his TER name. It limits his acceptance where they don’t want to be downgraded or begrudged by oily skin or the few extra pounds, true or not, it might cost him opportunity. He can still review them later, and as long as they don’t put 2 and 2 together they will likely just complain it was a fake review, true or not...
A change of email address would be needed since the ladies can look up reviews that way.If not based on his reviews, what was your opinion based on? This thread?? Seems it was your pointing out the comment of oily skin which was in his review. That an how unkept or dirty she was. If you where in his place how would you have wanted others to know and consider meeting her?
Smartie brought up the oily skin comment in his review in an earlier post. Who am I to say? I wasn't there either. I don't know him, or her. I see patterns in his reviews, but that doesn't give me the right to label him as this or that. I don't know how I would have put that particular issue in to review. I don't see women who have hygiene problems. Actually...if the girl was dirty, I would have walked. Then there wouldn't have been a review to leave anyway.
If I showed up dirty or drunk, or whatever, she would be well within her right to kick my ass out. But I'm not a disrespectful prick...so that isn't ever going to be the case. It's just a disagreement. I saw your comment that I better hope my username is never known. Why, because not getting in line with what any provider says on here means I'm a problem client? She uses an alias too. So do you. All the shit posted about this SESTA stuff and censorship, but I should fear having a different opinion on a matter than someone else? Well fuck me!
My suggestion was he would be better off not letting his TER name be known as his history might turn others off. I however write reviews as an alias. Not to slam a bad session though.
I’m not taking sides here. Everyone is different and should ignore those who have opposing opinions. But here with the anonymity allowed some much enjoy belittling others for there POV. I would hope Smarty could explain how reviews are not the measurement to have judge him lacking empathy if not for having read his reviews only to comment about the one mentioning her appearance. Honestly I understand how ladies that are told buy guys they are nice sweet respectful might actually turn them off and as someone said more than a few who talk so highly about themselves actually turn out to be worse than those who don’t.Most providers have been abused and treated badly by men. So when a guy is nice to a provider it's a shock to their system. Think about it for a minute. If someone has been treated badly and abused for a while that's the behavior they expect from everyone. It's very sad. I've had a few providers like this. When a guy is nice to these girls they don't know how to react. It's like the "Deer In The Headlight" look.
I read 6 of your reviews, half positive and half negative, and there's nothing dehumanizing or degrading about what you wrote as long as it's accurate. If providers can't handle being held to account for their poor hygiene or performance then they should de-list and find a safe space.
As a client I'd like to know if the provider I'm interested in has oily skin or a vagina that smells like rotting fish so I can find an alternative who's as clean and hygienic as I am. Clients shouldn't have to ask providers to brush their teeth for Christ's sake. If women in this business want good reviews then they have to earn them by working hard, not doing the bare fucking minimum and expecting to be praised to the heavens by a bunch of white knights. It's called professionalism.
Neither you, nor I know the truth in this. It could be a problem, or it could be bad hygiene. I just don't see it as harshly as you do. Dehumanizing...not so much. Demoralizing.... yes, if she has self esteem issues, I'm sure it could be quite hurtful to her.
He may have made a rash judgement about her skin.
But she may have also not freshened up before the appointment
Are you absolutely saying that a skin issue is the only reason this could have occurred? That there's no possibility that her or any provider out there may not keep up with themselves once in awhile?
I'm just trying to be objective here...
If the tables were turned, and a " trick" showed up to you " appearing" dirty, would you accept it as a condition rather than he didn't bath?
I just think your having a knee-jerk reaction to him saying something about a fellow provider.
Anyway....ive lost interest in this debate, as it's going nowhere. You have your opinion, and it's clear you won't be swayed.
If I had a nickel for every provider who told me they were on an antidepressant or anti-anxiety or bipolar medication, then I'd have a giant vault like Scrooge McDuck filled with nickels. And these are the well-reviewed ones!
I like to chat with an escort before we're intimate (I'm one of those awful "nice guys") and get to know her a little bit and Jesus Christ the stories they tell me. For their sake I hope they're just lying to get sympathy and a tip. There are a lot of broken women in this business and protestations to the contrary I don't believe most of them when they tell me they love what they do.I completely understand how sensitive women are about looks. The oily skin part wasn’t necessary.
I had also asked how you would have written the review but that’s ok you don’t have to. Having read a few other reviews of her it quickly became apparent she was average in looks, her pics must have been old and maybe heavier looking in person. This place is a FBSM with HJ finish. I guess it’s because she gets undressed is why it’s 220, similar places here are 160 on average. Apparently she likes to talk more than massage. Her massage skills are average at best and most who reviewed her found that to be the case. She doesn’t like to kiss and unless you’re massaging her there are no outward signs of sensuality or arrousal. But his later statement to add she was dirty and apparently this place doesn’t offer mouth wash and requesting her to brush her teeth at least wasn’t in his review. Not sure why she would have to brush her teeth as she doesn’t like to kiss unless he forgot to say she also had bad breath. His review mentions her adjusting the heat so it was likely her sweating that caused her oily skin. Most of the spas have the heat up too high and ladies oil up there body to keep moisture in and slide there bodies sensually over you, not one review mentioned that being the case. I doubt she reads her reviews, at least the detailed part, those running the agency may. I give him credit for not using an alias, but he shouldn’t expect full service ladies that screen to see him. Even though reviews for you don’t matter, ladies I know are just as sensitive about scores then someone saying they have oily skin issues, if not more. Don’t you agree? The spas and massage services like this seldom are reviewed giving high appearance scores, and since they don’t have a full menu of service they are luck to get about 6, Nice Time, a 5 being Average. I’m sure you would have done much better having experience she apparently lacked.
I like to chat with an escort before we're intimate (I'm one of those awful "nice guys") and get to know her a little bit and Jesus Christ the stories they tell me. For their sake I hope they're just lying to get sympathy and a tip.
There are a lot of broken women in this business and protestations to the contrary I don't believe most of them when they tell me they love what they do.
I don't doubt that many of the stories I'm told are true since the women I've spoken with seem very sincere and honest.
I have performance issues because of a medication that I take and when I address the issue at the beginning of a session about 2/3s of the ladies confess to being on meds and struggling with either depression or anxiety.And these are the well-reviewed, professional escorts! There's the human part of me that naturally feels empathy, but then there's that cynical part that's been around the block a few too many times. I guess all I can do is be a decent, respectful client and just listen when they want someone to talk to.
More than 25% of all women in the USA are on mental health drugs of some sort, leading my friend to quip -- "Oh my God, that means 75% of them are walking around untreated!!!"
I had a similar situation once. Having a chat with a lady and I asked something that I thought was harmless and her response almost brought her to tears. Her eyes got watery but she withheld the tears. I felt really bad. I don't know if she was on meds though but what a sad site to see.
Was with an agency girl, who I saw for over a year intermittently. She had been drinking...
But she broke down crying and thanking me for always treating her as a lady, and not a pro.
God, I miss her!